Don’t call the Sheriff!

Speculation has been rampant as to my whereabouts; certainly reports of my demise have been greatly exculpated. But after being away from this blog for a month, dear readers, I’m back here at the Winehiker Central keyboard and ready to once again launch my usual antics into the greater cosmos. If you’ve been missing me at all, I can assure you that I’ve missed you, too - there’s something gloriously heartwarming about sharing my thoughts publicly and learning how those thoughts resonate with you.

Even if you haven’t written me lately, I suppose you’ve been wondering where I’ve been. Indeed, the speculative inquiries that have lately arrived in my inbox are intriguing, amusing, even vexing. Over the course of the last month, it’s been suggested that I’ve experienced the following:

• I’ve been holed up in a hospital for the vinologically insane.
• I’ve been held hostage on a Mendocino County grape-farming commune and forced to pick, sort, and crush grapes 18 hours a day (while naked) and surviving only on tofu and toadstools.
• I’ve been stuck in a slot canyon in Utah and had to cut my own arm off to escape the terrible fate of never drinking wine again while everybody else was searching for Steve Fawcett.
• I’ve been sitting in the sunshine singing a little sunshine song (see first bullet).
• I’ve been in love.
• I’ve been in jail.
• I’ve been enjoying a well-deserved vacation from winehiking which, naturally, included more winehiking.

At least one of the above I’ve beens is true. But rather than tell you which that is, I think it will be fun to let you guess, via your comments on this post, as to what I’ve been up to. Consider it a Winehiker’s neoversion of that venerable TV game show To Tell The Truth.

So, where has the winehiker been? In any case, don’t call the Sheriff, and please cancel that print order for those milk cartons!! I am returned from the missing, and I will see you tomorrow.

~winehiker

This entry was posted on Wednesday, September 19th, 2007 at 10:35 am and is filed under grape squeezins, winehiker's trails. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.